Sunday, October 04, 2009

New most embarrassing moments...

Right here, for your very much blog reading enjoyment, Marla's new most embarrassing moment...

So we were at church all day Friday. Finally got home, packed to leave on Saturday and crashed because Hana's preschool had sports day the next morning. Sports day was scheduled to end around 12:00 and we had to catch a train at 12:55. Our travel would take about 6 hours to get to Kouchi for a Saturday evening concert and Sunday morning concert, after which we would turn around and come back home (yes, we sign up for this kind of craziness). Sports day went very smoothly and finished early. We actually got to sit down in a restaurant to have lunch. I was beginning to think this crazy trip might not be so bad.

We boarded a train to the main station in town, and then hopped on a bullet train. Kai slept a good part of the way, all was going well. UNTIL we were pulling in to our stop to get off the bullet train. Hana just casually says, "I think I'll go to the bathroom after we get off the train." and I say, "Okay, sure we can do that." I'm holding Kai (still asleep) and Rocky disappears to throw some trash away when I notice a panicked look on Hana's face. And she says, "Mooooommmmy, I am peeing in my pants." I'm like, "Oh my gosh Hana, STOP, wait!" But I look down and her shoes are filling with pee, beginning to overflow and a huge puddle is forming on the floor beneath her. Have I mentioned that this child has been totally potty trained for more than 3 years and never had an accident after about the first month or two after potty training was done?

You must keep in mind, a bullet train stops at a station for like a minute, and we were slowing down for our stop. If we miss this stop we will have to ride another long ways to the next stop get off and come back (we are on the Nozomi super express which doesn't stop very often) and that will make us late for our concert engagement. I'm holding sleeping Kai and can do nothing like pull a diaper or something out of my bag to start soaking up teetee and there is no train staff person in sight.

At this point I'm standing still in a panic having no idea what to do. I must have looked like a flamingo, motionless and doing nothing, only I had both legs on the ground. Rocky appears again and I tell him to do something but he can't find anything to clean it up and we are like seconds from stopping. I look back and a long line of pee is slowly making it's way down the aisle of the train and people are starting to look back to see what is this liquid running down the aisle beside them.

Finally I see a train staff person coming towards me and tell her what happened. She grabs some paper towels and starts to clean it up and all I can do is apologize and bow profusely, stating that we must get off the train at this stop. All the while row by row, train passengers are looking back and I can see the realization come across their face as to what is this mysterious river running down the aisle. The foreigner stands there apologizing and bobbing her head like a duck fishing in the pond as a little girl stands beside her with her legs spread apart in an uncomfortable stance and little wet footprints are following her.

At this point the train staffer begins to ignore my constant apology as I can see this look of total resentment begins to spread across her face. I know she's thinking, "Why did I have to be the one who came walking through this car at this moment? This is not a part of my job description, cleaning up pee!"

By this time the train is stopping and my last glimpse of the car we were riding in, was the passengers in aisle 2,3,4,5 and 6 staring back at us with disdain, several passengers scrambling to get their bags up off the floor, a line of papers towels following the river of pee and the crumpled nose of the train staffer as she is frantically dropping paper towels and whipping up pee.

We exited the train and Rocky and I both just sighed. At moments like these, you can comfort yourself with two thoughts... (or maybe three)

1. I will never see any of those people again in my entire life (or at least I hope I won't. won't it be hilarious when someone comes up to me after a concert some day and tells me where they've seen me before --- but I choose not to think of that right now)
2. I am a foreigner here and can be forgiven instantly for almost any social faux pas, as I am not supposed to "know better". (ya think that works here? am I not supposed to know better than to stand motionless doing nothing while my daughters pee runs down a train aisle and then just walk off the train as someone else cleans it up? Yea sure, that works for me...)
3. And lastly, no one ever has to know about this cause I won't ever see those people again in my life (only I am sharing about this on my BLOG where hundreds of people might read it)

Yea, I feel comforted...

Okay, so I get Hana changed and even washed her up in the huge sink I found in the handicap bathroom at the station. We rush to catch our connecting train. At this point Hana is barefoot and everyone is staring at that now. But at least they're smiling at how cute she looks happily tagging along her Dora backpack, carefree and barefoot on a trip with Mommy and Daddy (if they only knew)!

The next train however, for some reason begins to rock and sway. I could have sworn we took a train, not a boat. It is almost impossible to stand up and walk on this train. hmmmm, interesting. Trying to keep Hana entertained since we can't get up and walk around, I start playing games with her and then reading her books. Along about the end of the second book I start to notice a very familiar feeling. Yep, motion sickness coming on fast.

I proceed to turn increasingly bright shades of green as my body temperature decides to sky rocket, and my stomach begins whisper unpleasant things in my ear. I make a couple trips to the area between cars where the bathrooms are, to be on standby (just in case). All the while, my stomach stops whispering and begins to speak louder and louder. Several times I actually go inside the bathroom but nothing is happening. Well except for all the moaning I'm doing and praying to Jesus, "Just let me throw up, let me get it over with. Cast these demons out of my tummy Please Jesus, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!"

I returned to my seat for a moment because I can hear Kai fussing about Mommy being gone (both of my children seem to know when Mommy isn't feeling well, Hana once had a screaming fit when I was motion sick and had to leave her to go be sick). I tried to hold and comfort Kai, but at this point I think the moment is approaching. I turn Kai back over to Daddy and head back for the rest room at which point the sign on the door says "occupied"! For the last 30 minutes no one has been anywhere near this restroom. NOW they choose to occupy it! UGH! I rush back to grab a plastic bag we had full of snacks and have to huddle in the corner for the Lord to bring about the answer to my prayers.

Yes, not 10 seconds later I hear the person exit the toilet and at that point it was all over. UGH!

Even getting that over with didn't make things better and the last hour on that train I was pretty miserable. We arrived at our destination and about one hour later launched into a one and half hour concert where I had to give my testimony in Japanese. All the while Kai is screaming in the baby room because it is past his bed time, and I could clearly hear him.

I've never been so happy to check into a hotel room my entire life. I slept like a rock that night.

Today's trip home... not nearly as eventful. I'm so glad to be home!

1 comment:

tiffany said...

My oh, my! Poor mommy dear! At least you can look back on this day and get a good laugh! And see how the Lord enabled you to do the concert in spite of it all! LOL thanks for sharing and putting a smile on my face!

....I like picturing you as a flamingo ;)